A heartfelt examination of how Bollywood’s portrayal of marriage affects real women’s choices
When the lights dimmed and Bollywood’s latest offering. “Mrs” began to play across screens nationwide, something more than just a story unfolded—a narrative took shape that has left many women. Particularly those of faith, feeling misunderstood and misrepresented. As the final credits rolled, I found myself not just reviewing a film, but examining the ripple effects its message sends through our society.
Released on Zee5 on February 7, 2025, “Mrs” is a Hindi-language drama film directed by Aarti Kadav, starring Sanya Malhotra alongside Kanwaljit Singh and Nishant Dahiya. As a remake of the acclaimed Malayalam film “The Great Indian Kitchen” (2021), it arrives with high expectations and a ready-made audience. But its messages about marriage deserve careful examination, especially as they reach millions of viewers across the country.
The Subtle Messaging Behind the Scenes
“Mrs” isn’t just entertainment—it’s a cultural statement. While artistically compelling, the film paints marriage as an outdated institution that primarily serves society while constraining women. The protagonist’s journey subtly reinforces the false notion that professional fulfillment and personal freedom cannot coexist with married life.
Some scenes left me with a knot in my stomach—particularly those portraying married women as having sacrificed their dreams, their identities gradually dissolving into the background of their husbands’ lives. Yes, the film addresses valid concerns about patriarchal expectations, but it fails to present the other side: marriages where both partners elevate each other.
“You’ll lose yourself,” warns one character to another. “Your career will become secondary,” cautions another.
Throughout the narrative, marriage is framed not as the beginning of a shared journey, but as the end of a woman’s individual path. This portrayal breaks my heart—not because it rings true, but because I know countless women for whom marriage has been a source of strength, support, and profound joy.
The Dangerous False Choice
Perhaps most troubling is the persistent framing of career and marriage as mutually exclusive options. This dichotomy doesn’t just appear on screen—it infiltrates conversations among friends, family advice, and even professional guidance given to young women.
My heart aches when I hear brilliant, compassionate women speak as though they must choose between professional success and sharing their life with a partner. This either/or thinking has created unnecessary anxiety and delayed happiness for so many who might otherwise have confidently pursued both paths.
The Clock That Ticks Too Loudly
“Your time is running out.” “Your fertility is declining.”
These messages, though based in medical reality, have been weaponized to rush women into marriages they’re not ready for, with partners they haven’t properly vetted. The biological clock narrative has brought many to tears in private moments of doubt and fear. I’ve held friends’ hands as they wrestled with these pressures, torn between their desire for children and their equally valid desire for the right partnership.
Society’s rigid timeline rarely aligns with personal readiness. Women are expected to establish careers by their late twenties, find partners by their early thirties, and start families before their “fertility window” closes. This timeline ignores individual circumstances, emotional readiness, and the simple truth that finding the right person cannot be scheduled.
A Different Vision: Marriage as Partnership
As a Muslim woman, I’ve grown to understand marriage not as a social obligation but as a spiritual partnership. Islam views marriage as half of one’s faith—a bond that brings comfort, companionship, and mutual growth. The Prophet Muhammad described it as a fortress against loneliness and temptation, a safe haven where two souls find peace in one another.
This perspective moved me deeply when I first truly understood it—marriage in Islam isn’t about limiting women’s potential but about creating a foundation from which both partners can rise higher than they could alone.
The Real Fear Worth Having
The tragedy isn’t choosing marriage—it’s choosing marriage hastily, under pressure, with someone who doesn’t value your essence. I’ve witnessed the profound suffering that comes from such decisions: women who dimmed their light to please controlling partners, who abandoned dreams to fit someone else’s vision, who lost years trying to make fundamentally incompatible relationships work.
These stories bring me to tears far more than the thought of marriage itself ever could. The pain stems not from the institution of marriage but from entering it with the wrong person for the wrong reasons.
Finding Your Own Path
There’s a special courage required to resist the tidal wave of societal pressure—to say “not yet” or “not him” when everyone around you pushes for a different answer. This courage doesn’t come easily, but it’s essential for creating a life that reflects your true values rather than borrowed expectations.
I’ve been moved to tears by the strength I’ve seen in women who stood their ground, who weathered family disappointment and social judgment to honor their own inner knowing about when and whom to marry.
Our bodies often know before our minds when something isn’t right. That unsettled feeling, that persistent doubt, that quiet voice whispering “wait”—these are not enemies of commitment but guardians of our wellbeing.
Both/And, Not Either/Or
The most powerful realization is that we can create our own timelines—ones that honor our unique journeys, opportunities, and readiness. This doesn’t mean denying biological realities, but it does mean refusing to let those realities dictate choices that affect every aspect of our lives.
The either/or paradigm—career or marriage—is not just discouraging; it’s demonstrably false. Countless women have built meaningful careers while nurturing loving marriages. The key lies not in choosing between these aspects of life but in finding a partner who genuinely supports your ambitions and working together to create a life that accommodates both your dreams.
Beyond the Credits: What We Really Need
The message of films like “Mrs” contains important truths about the dangers of marrying for the wrong reasons or under excessive pressure. Yet the solution isn’t to fear marriage itself, but to approach it with wisdom, patience, and self-knowledge.
We can honor the beauty of marriage as a spiritual institution while still being discerning about when and with whom we enter this covenant. We can acknowledge the very real challenges that married women face in patriarchal societies while still believing in the possibility of partnerships based on mutual respect and support.
The conversation we need isn’t about whether to marry, but about creating a society where women can make this choice freely, without pressure or penalty, with partners who value their whole selves—dreams, ambitions, and all.
By.
Sadia Rafiq
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